I know that for the most part we try to put our best selves out there because really who wants to read someone complain all the time. I do try to reflect the good and the bad times on this blog and in real life. For the most part I try and look at the good parts of life but I do have my moments. The ups and downs of life are going to happen with every one and every season of life. Lately it feels like I am in a down period.
I am going to do my best to break out of it, and I will try hard to not be in it for long. Normally I get even more introverted than I am usually until I work through it, blame the analytical Virgo that I am. I become a little more reflective and these are some of the things that are troubling me, or putting me in a funk.
+ I have been struggling to keep up with my housework. I have my own home and so I have to clean it myself. I know, cry me a river. I am lucky but some weeks it is just overwhelming with other commitments. Also dog hair everywhere. Shedding season stinks.
+ Work has been challenging, in a good way in that I have new responsibilities and hiring some people for support but it does come with stress. Training is a lot of work. This is the busy time of year so it will get better in a few months, I just have to get through it.
+ With the stress I haven’t been eating as clean as I normally do and I am feeling it. I am not working out as much either. Lots of travel and events haven’t helped but I need to be better.
+ I don’t really sleep much on a good day (like 5.5 hours) but recently I have been getting even less, tossing and turning.
+ I struggle with trying to juggle to remember everyone’s birthday and try to get them something. My birthday is next month and I struggle with wanting to pretend it’s not really a birthday and whether or not anyone even cares.
+ I have been having pains in my chest. No heart attack pains but stress pains, and being anxious.
+ I’ve also been having heartburn from not drinking enough water. I usually get hiccups too which is a sign I need more water. I normally drink about a gallon and a half of water so even 60 ounces isn’t enough.
+ While I got the green light from the Vet for Seamus I also got a call from them on Monday. They said he has slightly elevated enzymes from his liver panel blood work. There is nothing I can do at this point but he will need to be monitored in the next 6 months. More than likely I will take him back in 3 months so I can have peace of mind. This one just about breaks me the most. I know he won’t live forever but I don’t think I can handle it right now. (I start crying as I type this and Seamus comes running and leans right into me and kisses my face, he needs to be ok) *I also saw this post on Facebook regarding Beneful dog food, which I used to feed Seamus for years – one of the supposed side effects – liver damage. Link to News Article
I am not writing this for sympathy but to get it out of my head. Maybe someone might say “Me too” and feel better that they aren’t going through it alone. Maybe it’s just for me so I can acknowledge it and move on. Maybe so I don’t feel like I have to be perfect all the time. Maybe it’s just to explain in case I pull back a little bit. I have to be a little selfish so that I can figure everything out, and get back on track. I know that is a lot of maybe’s and just maybe it’s okay not to know for sure.
So that I don’t leave this post on a total downer I bring you a quote from the Infamous SNL skit Jack Handy, which was in the back of my head while writing this post.