I know that for the most part we try to put our best selves out there because really who wants to read someone complain all the time. I do try to reflect the good and the bad times on this blog and in real life. For the most part I try and look at the good parts of life but I do have my moments. The ups and downs of life are going to happen with every one and every season of life. Lately it feels like I am in a down period.
I am going to do my best to break out of it, and I will try hard to not be in it for long. Normally I get even more introverted than I am usually until I work through it, blame the analytical Virgo that I am. I become a little more reflective and these are some of the things that are troubling me, or putting me in a funk.
+ I have been struggling to keep up with my housework. I have my own home and so I have to clean it myself. I know, cry me a river. I am lucky but some weeks it is just overwhelming with other commitments. Also dog hair everywhere. Shedding season stinks.
+ Work has been challenging, in a good way in that I have new responsibilities and hiring some people for support but it does come with stress. Training is a lot of work. This is the busy time of year so it will get better in a few months, I just have to get through it.
+ With the stress I haven’t been eating as clean as I normally do and I am feeling it. I am not working out as much either. Lots of travel and events haven’t helped but I need to be better.
+ I don’t really sleep much on a good day (like 5.5 hours) but recently I have been getting even less, tossing and turning.
+ I struggle with trying to juggle to remember everyone’s birthday and try to get them something. My birthday is next month and I struggle with wanting to pretend it’s not really a birthday and whether or not anyone even cares.
+ I have been having pains in my chest. No heart attack pains but stress pains, and being anxious.
+ I’ve also been having heartburn from not drinking enough water. I usually get hiccups too which is a sign I need more water. I normally drink about a gallon and a half of water so even 60 ounces isn’t enough.
+ While I got the green light from the Vet for Seamus I also got a call from them on Monday. They said he has slightly elevated enzymes from his liver panel blood work. There is nothing I can do at this point but he will need to be monitored in the next 6 months. More than likely I will take him back in 3 months so I can have peace of mind. This one just about breaks me the most. I know he won’t live forever but I don’t think I can handle it right now. (I start crying as I type this and Seamus comes running and leans right into me and kisses my face, he needs to be ok) *I also saw this post on Facebook regarding Beneful dog food, which I used to feed Seamus for years – one of the supposed side effects – liver damage. Link to News Article
I am not writing this for sympathy but to get it out of my head. Maybe someone might say “Me too” and feel better that they aren’t going through it alone. Maybe it’s just for me so I can acknowledge it and move on. Maybe so I don’t feel like I have to be perfect all the time. Maybe it’s just to explain in case I pull back a little bit. I have to be a little selfish so that I can figure everything out, and get back on track. I know that is a lot of maybe’s and just maybe it’s okay not to know for sure.
So that I don’t leave this post on a total downer I bring you a quote from the Infamous SNL skit Jack Handy, which was in the back of my head while writing this post.
I am so sorry for your struggles right now, friend. You have a lot going on and stress eventually takes its toll. Hopefully things begin to work themselves out soon and level out. And I know how much you love Seamus, hopefully he is fine! And I am glad you shared your feelings, being real is hard but also worth it. Love you!
Thank you. I think it is a buildup and it did hit me hard. So far with Seamus it is a wait and see game, as long as it doesn’t get worse he should be ok.
Heather (@mylittlehea) says
I’ve seen some other posts throughout blog land with struggles and I am so sorry to hear you’re struggling too. Especially with your birthday month coming up! I am here for you, and you have to do what’s best for you. Taking time, really is what is needed sometimes and it can feel like it’s coming at you from all angles!! *hugs* I am miles away, but here for you if you want to talk.
We just started buying Boomer Beneful since he’s getting older and has rotting teeth so they have a couple of options for that, now we need to find something else. Thanks for sharing that article. Hopefully Seamus will pull through this just as strong as you!
Thank you so much. It just all happened at once and so I am struggling, I am sure I’ll make it through in a few months.
I switch awhile back but his elevated liver enzymes could be from that and it is scary. I feed him Blue Buffalo now thankfully.
Linda sheridan says
Good to get things off your chest. It’s human to get down sometimes. And, Good Goddess, no one can sleep
These days. Our furry kids! I have asked the universe for 15 years! They are 7. I can’t even think about them not being here, but know I will see them on the other side. Usually, some sad story in the news will get me out of funks. This morning an article on a father finding his dead son in the Delaware River who went missing this weekend!
Lights and love to you!
Love, SMD’s Momma
I can only hope he lives that long, I know I would be lost without him. I know it won’t last forever this feeling so I just have to press forward. Thank you.
chelsea jacobs says
So sorry that you’re having such a down time right now–I say don’t feel bad at all, we all have them! I hope getting it all out there helped you feel a tiny bit better!
Thank you, it does help to talk about it.
oh hon, i am so sorry. I hope Seamus is okay, I totally understand where you are coming from there. But you are an amazing dog mom and he couldn’t be in better hands!
I think we all have our ups and downs (i feel you on cleaning the house.. sigh.. and eating not-so-clean) and i normally find talking about them or commiserating with people can help me. I used to get super down and it would be really hard to get out of my funk, I’ve actually found blogging to help because I can talk to people about it. I am currently not down exactly, but in a funk and feeling blah especially with eating and exercise. I hope we both get out of it soon.
Thanks, his issues concern me the most, I know I can pull through but he depends on me. I hope we both can too.
I go through funks too and they are so hard on you mentally. I’m already dreading August 20th when my sunrise dog walks have to end, I know I’m going to get down about it.
Try to schedule a Kerry day, a day where you are not allowed to worry and are only aloud to do things Kerry loves to do. Nothing you feel obligated to do! If you find yourself thing about stressful things redirect your attention and just enjoy doing what you love that day. I find days like that really rejuvenate me!
They really take their toll physically and mentally. I am sure those walks really help to just clear your mind. A Kerry day would really help. Thanks!
I know just what you are going through. When I get stressed and anxious, I totally get the chest pains. The first time it happened, I was so scared. I have a very stressful job and the summer is one of our busiest times of the year. Take that along with the heat and humidity and I’m just miserable. I find that keeping a journal has helped as well as getting outside and going for walk. Even if the walk is only for a few minutes, it helps to clean my head. Perhaps that a few days off to recharge your batteries. I find that to be really helpful. Hugs.
It is so very scary. The summer is mine too. I have been trying to walk but sometimes I just want to crash on the couch too. Thank you so much!
I realize this is easier said than done but breathe girl!! Everything doesn’t have to get done right away as for the sleep that you really need to get – have you tried melatonin – that helps me when I can’t sleep!!! xo, Biana
Thank you. I am trying to remember that I can’t do it all and I have to say No more. I haven’t tried that but I know I need to get more hours.
I never remember anything and I totally thought about your bday the other day! It sounds like everything is just happening at once. I hope you’re able to let go of some of the non-necessary or less time-sensitive tasks to focus on you and the things you want and need to do. I totally feel you on the housework never ending and something with a pet always needing to be done, and then work. You aren’t alone! You are entitled to feel however you feel and just because someone else’s problems might seem more serious or dire, it doesn’t make the way you feel invalid. Hugs!
Thank you. I have tried to let go as much as I can but maybe I need to do so even more. I never want to let someone down or make others feel they aren’t important but I can’t do everything too. Thank you, it seems to be always something and all at once. I just need to hold on.
Bri @ My Life As... says
Writing stuff out always helps me to start feeling better too. It’s a perfect way to unload. You obviously don’t instantly forget about it but it’s like by putting it on paper you’re letting some of the burden go. I used to get anxiety chest pains ALL. THE. TIME. which only made my anxiety worse. I hope that things start to turn around for you soon dear.
Yes, just organizing my thoughts and knowing what is stressing me out helps for me to make a plan to make it better. I hope so too!
Writing stuff out always makes a huge difference for me, too. It’s nice to not have it all floating around, taking up my head space anymore. I can definitely understand and feel you when you talk about feeling overwhelmed by the house and the other things you have going on. It probably doesn’t help that we grow up associating summers with relaxation and then it’s not the busy season for your job. Be gracious with yourself and relieve yourself from the pressure to get it all done. It’s hard, but it’s going to help you. (At least, it’s always what helps me.) Hang in there! 🙂
Yes most people are relaxing and enjoying the summer and mine is just crazy and hectic. I am trying to work on being ore focused on when I am getting to that stress level and just not accepting more invitations but it sure is hard. I know i’ll get through it. Thanks!
Rebecca Jo says
Oh friend… I get it… stress piles.
I couldn’t sleep the other night because my mind wouldn’t shut off & not getting sleep makes things so much worse – vicious cycle.
I get what it is worrying about those fur babies 🙁 … I didn’t know that about Beneful. I used to use that & our lab had liver cancer!!!!!! Just a hint if you haven’t heard before – you probably have – we used milk thistle a lot for our girl … she lived quite a long time with liver cancer actually. Read up on alternative things for dogs with liver disease. It’s like a human – you can try & give that liver a break & help it along in healing up a bit.
Thank you so much! I will look into that, and possibly give it a try. I am hoping it is just his normal level and it won’t progress but everything little bit helps.
I cannot even think about life without Hawkeye. I refuse to accept it. Seriously if something happens to her, I’ll need to be locked in a psych ward on suicide watch for awhile. Everyone thinks that’s overly dramatic, but … it really is the truth. Seamus will be ok. No carbs! haha I don’t know how doggie livers work but my liver enzymes were high too and the doc said no more carbs. Maybe that’ll work for Seamus too. Guess he just gets all the meat instead.
Melatonin for sleep? That’s what I use, it works amazingly well.
I am with you girl. They are our lives. I will try just about anything to keep him healthy. I haven’t used Melatonin before but I’ll check it out. Thanks!
Emily @ Martinis & Bikinis says
We definitely all feel like this at times. Sunnier days are ahead. I’m sorry to hear about Seamus and hoping it doesn’t become too serious! *hugs*
Thank you, I know I’ll get through it but it will be tough. I am hoping it just stays as is and doesn’t get worse. Fingers crossed.
I think that we all go through ups and downs and that is normal. I totally understand what you mean about chest pains from anxiety, I get those too and I hate that! It is hard to focus on things you usually do good at (clean eating and fitness) when you have so much other stuff going on. I myself have had a hard time getting back in to the swing of things.
As far as the dog food goes, I hate when i see stuff like that. We put our trust in these brands that they are making the best products they can for our loved ones when it just isn’t the case. I recently switched my dogs food after learning that the company I was using lied about their ingredients. It was expensive dog food and I cant believe the false advertisement. Gracie is 10 and has horrible allergies and she can’t really hear anymore because of all the problems she had with her ears. It is hard to see them get older and start having problems. I am sending you lots of hugs!
I fed him that for years and it burns me that there isn’t more regulations for dog food. It is so hard to see them age, Seamus is turning 10 in October.
I still really think that one of the best things about blogging is when you share the good, and bad, that someone out there will always read along and think me too or I’m not alone in this. I’m so sorry with how down you’ve been feeling, it sounds like you have so much on your plate and I can’t imagine being worried about Seamus on top of everything else. It seems like it’s always way too easy for the bad or hard things to just pile up and I think most people get to a point where you just want to give in and do nothing- even though you know that doesn’t help. I really don’t have any advice, other than try not to be so hard on yourself, you really are doing an amazing job with everything <3
Yes, I have been at that point where I just want to come home and just sleep. Thank you so much for the support, it means a lot.
So sorry to hear you’re struggling. I get in funks too and am currently working my way out of one too. It’s easy for things to pile on once you have one thing that kind of makes down or out of wack.
It is way to easy for it to feel overwhelming. Hope you keeping working your way out of it.
I hear ya on the shedding. I have a cat that sheds. His fur is EVERYWHERE.
And trust me, I get into funks too.
It is never ending picking up the fur. Thank you.
Erin of TexErin-in-SydneyLand says
I think it’s really important to find constructive ways to do what you just did…get some of these life struggles out of your head. When we leave them rolling around in our head, they can cause more harm. (my belief) I am one who battles with what rolls around in my own head, then I get frustrated with myself that there are far worse things I could be facing, then I have to remind myself that no matter how “big” or “small” the struggle, it is real and has real effects. And, the side effects from anxiety are real too. Keep battling.
Yes, being able to get them down on paper/blog gives them less power. Everyone has those struggles and it can all build to high. Thank you, I’ll keep moving forward.
all the hugs in the world to you. i feel like this was me writing this post because i am going through a lot of the same things right now. you will get through this. i promise. this won’t last forever. you can email me any time, day or night, if you need me.
Thank you so much. We are stronger than we think and we will get through this for sure.
Brianne Bracco says
Hugs sweet friend…and know that these days are normal. We can’t all be on point all the time just because we put ourselves out there in the blogging/social media world. It only adds to the stress when you think “oh crap, I didn’t blog these past couple of days..” or “I haven’t posted anything on Instagram in a few days…” What you should really think is, “I just want to come home, change in my comfies, pour a glass of wine, and do nothing else..” And that is OK! It’s more normal to think these days are ok, then to think otherwise. 😉
Thank you so much. That is pretty much what I want to do everyday. Just such an overwhelming feeling lately. Thanks for the support.
Thanks for being so honest. Everyone has things they’re struggling with, and it’s good to acknowledge that those stresses are REAL and NORMAL. It’s also good you’ve identified some of them, like drinking more water and eating healthier. As far as cleaning, you may have heard of her already, but cleanmama.net has a weekly cleaning schedule that I’ve started using at the house, and for me it’s been awesome to have a schedule of what to do each day. It might be helpful for you!
Thank you. It was good to just put it out there so it doesn’t have control over me. I haven’t heard of her but I’ll check it out.
Sorry to hear you’re going through a rough time. I often toss and turn at night since it can be hard for me to shut my mind off. Hope everything will be okay with Seamus! Our fur babies are like our kids so I understand how worried you are. Sending you hugs!
Yes, my mind races and lots of stress. They are our babies and it is so hard to hear when they are sick.
Teh Megan says
I have seen several people with “funky” posts this week. Too bad we can’t still blame mercury retrograde!
My blog is my space to talk it out. I’m not necessarily looking for sympathy either when I post the “feelz” posts, but I can’t say that the encouraging messages from readers don’t help me move through it a little quicker. I’m totally feeling you on the cleaning and the sleep and the dog front. My dogs have been sickly since we moved, nothing serious like Seamus, but just off, which has me a bit concerned and having just moved, the money for substantial vet bills really isn’t high on the budget right now, but I know if it came to it, I’d take them nonetheless.
Yes, it really helps to hear from others who have felt the same at one point. It is a struggle but I will get through it. It all seems to be too much at times. Moving is so expensive so unplanned vet visits can get really expensive, hope it is nothing serious and they are ok.
Kay R. says
The work, stress and lack of sleep pretty much sums me up these days. I actually have a long ramble drafted for monday… I just wrote today and decided heck Ill post it on monday! I hope you cheer up soon lovely lady. Life does get overwhelming some times – and us Virgos go crazy with the analysing but it will get better 🙂
It is so not good for you but I totally have been feeling the same. I swear us Virgo’s can stress like no one else!
hugs, K. i wish i lived closer to you so we can hang and drink wine and talk.
sorry you’re going through a rough patch and i really do hope that things look up soon. life can get crazy at times but you’re strong so push through.
That would be awesome. Thank you I know it will get better I just have to get through it. Just so much happened all at once.
Big hugs lady! Screw the housework and hire something from Handy if you need help. It’s ok to ask for help–remember that. Please see a doctor if your pain continues but in the meantime, I prescribe a glass of red wine each night. I’m a doctor (of law) but close enough! xoxo
Thank you. i will check out Handy because I could use help. The house stuff takes so much work. I am keeping a close eye on it and promise to have it checked if it continue too long. xo